Assalamualaikum
Hai everyone. I hope writing about February on 4th day of March is not too late. So lets start..
As you know me closer and better, I am the type yang akan reflect myself everyday. Macam, What I had done with my life and what I had learn on that day #nerd But that's how I live my life. Maybe sebab dah dilahirkan sebagai seorang yang overthinking. So buat conclusion at the end of my day make me think of my life tomorrow. #doublenerd
Done intro yang sangat hmm cliché? I hope not. HAHA. In my post today I would like to share what had happen to me sepanjang lebih kurang 1 bulan new sem bermula. So I hye I'm 3rd year & 6th semester medical student! And next year is my clinical year #scary #cantimagine
February started with KHS (Kartu Hasil Studi = result) yang tak keluar lagi and maksudnya, taktahu lah berapa pointer sem lepas right. Its okay that's not the main story. Main story untuk permulaan sem apabila 2nd week of the new semester. All result dah dekat SIAM and I got D (FAIL OKAY) for my Methodology 3. On the same day, kami jumpa dengan dr. Harun as our PA. First time, Nadhirah senyap sepanjang conversation tu. First time Nadhirah tak tanya soalan apa2. Otak dah blank mengenangkan how my TA goes. How my life as medical student. Do I need to repeat one year hanya sebab subjek ni? I heard that siapa yang fail method takboleh proceed TA. Kalau kena repeat cemana nak bagi tahu mamayah they need to add on 6000USD for my fees. All thought coming at one time. Sampaikan tatau nak rasa apa masatu. I cant even crying pun (like how I usually comfort myself).
Back to dr. Harun, I ask about it. And guys! Suddenly tetibe rasa macam ada cahaya di penhujung jalan apabila dr. cakap anak bimbingan dia pun belum sempro, maybe one of my dosbin tak hantar my markah lagi dkat AKAD. Tachycardi masatu slowly berkurang. Sebab dah jam 4 so I comfort myself with everything I can do. Tak mengadu kat sesiapa lagi2 mamayah to not make them worried about these. And the next day, I went straight to AKAD and ask them about it. ALHAMDULILLAH guys, hari saya menjadi cerah kembali apabila mas Arif said memang one of my dosbin tak hantar markah lagi and the result boleh bertukar after dapat. He ask me to go to my dosbin for the mark. Masatu baru boleh nangis #stupid #happytapi Glad that I'm not alone. So I contact my dosbin and he said yes. Just meet him at RS. Itu satu lagi masalah. Lama gila appointment asyik cancel sebab my class full sampai 3 kadang kalau I free dr. pulak yang tak free Sampailah khamis lepas. Yep on 1st March finally I got my result. I don't know PJMK nak terima and nak bagi grade apa atas keterlambatan ini. Saya redho janji jangan fail. #PrayForMeOkay And just wanted to share Nadhirah excel gak ah sem lepas #Proud
Done dengan story itu.
Tak habis dengan debar pasal result suddenly 14th February 6.30 p.m. abang WhatsApp on family group. Tellng about something! I usually tak tengok phone while waiting for Isya' tapi on that day tetibe rasa kena cek phone, and tetibe juga dapat call dari abang masa baru nak buka phone telling me Mama involve in an accident and ask me to call mama. Alhamdulillah syukur it was an accident at the middle of traffic jammed (Bukan high impact accident). So mata mama merah sebab pressure oleh airbag yang sangat kuat. Mama terlanggar kereta depan sebab masatu tengah ngantuk and masa terlelap mama tertekan minyak and bam! Kuat juga lah kot smpai airbag keluar plus 2 kereta di depan involve. Alhamdulillah Nadhirah berjaya untuk tak nangis while comforting mama. I heard her voice masatu, mama oso tahan nangis and keep telling me she is okay and nothing bad happen takda patah pe semua takda. My heart feels so hurt at that time cause I cant do anything from here. And I cant even go back pun (this things makes me think that saving is so important)
Glad that ada orang bawakkan pi klinik and abang straight to clinic jemput mama and settle kereta. The whole night I keep asking the update from everyone. Izzah dah nangis2 dah and direct balik gombak, glad that juga I can comforting all my adik while abang settle things. Acah cam superhero jap masatu dok nasihat dorang jangan nangis, mama okay jangan buat mama tambah sedih and all padahal dorang tatau kakak dorg ni pretend to be strong je. Habis satu tisu penuh bakul sampah dah ni. The pro of being far away. We can pretend to be okay :(
Next day, after class 10 a.m. terus video call mama. Bengkak guys mata mama cam cina sepet mana tatau (saja buat joke supaya tak tegang and supaya no tears falling). Mama pun cm biasa pretend to be strong jugek. Haa drama lah dedua masatu. Sebab malam tu dah malam, mama gi GH haritu lah. Gi emergency terus dr refer gi ophthal. Terima kasih Ya Allah mama's case terus dihandle dengan cekap dan tuntas. After that memang ada few times juga lah appointment dr buat, bukan pasal the red eye tapi sebab mata malas mama yang sebelah kiri. Hahaha alahai. Thanks mama cooperate with the drs. Maybe mama memikirkan anak dia yang tengah belajar kat sini yang memerlukan patient tuk belajar. Tetibe juga suruh kakak amik mata. Em nope ma nope I got C+ for my Ophthalmology. Susaah! HAHA!
Few days juga lah mama cant drive alone. Janji dah pahni Ill drive you everywhere! Promise!!! Adik2 yang kat rumah tu pun sila cepat sikit boleh drive ntah bila ntah nak lulus JPJ ==' Oh haha the day mama pergi GH tu, to comfort myself, I festaim ponteng kelas dok kat bilik senyap2 cause I cant handle my emotion. Haha cant even talk to anyone with all the redness and emotion. So hujung minggu dok senyap dekat bilik. Takpe lah eh respi? HAHA
Banyak lagi benda yang berlaku yang buat Nadhirah makin emm 'matang'? terjadi bulan feb ni. Syukur dengan pengalaman yang mengajar ni. Bangga dengan diri sendiri juga sebab cengeng senyap2. Terima kasih kepada yang prihatin. Maybe tapernah menghadapi family member masuk hospital so I don't know how to react kecuali jd cengeng senyap2. HAH!
Thanks semua for reading this post yang quite panjang dan penuh emosi. Sampai jumpa! Bye~
NNE, 2018
Malang
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